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Healing Isn’t Giving Power Away — It’s Reclaiming It
Healing Isn’t Giving Power Away — It’s Reclaiming It
Many trauma survivors carry a hidden fear:
“If I face my trauma, I’m letting my perpetrator win.”
“If I face my trauma, I’m letting my perpetrator win.”
If you’ve ever felt this way, you’re not alone—and there’s a different story waiting for you.
Healing isn’t giving power away.
Healing is power—it’s how you finally take your life back.
Healing is power—it’s how you finally take your life back.
Why Suppression Feels Safer (At First)
Most of us learned somewhere along the way that it wasn’t safe to show our feelings.
Maybe it started in childhood—to avoid conflict, criticism, or rejection.
Maybe it began in adulthood—at work, in relationships, or during stressful seasons when “holding it together” was the only option.
Maybe it started in childhood—to avoid conflict, criticism, or rejection.
Maybe it began in adulthood—at work, in relationships, or during stressful seasons when “holding it together” was the only option.
Swallowing emotions is a survival skill. In the moment, it helps you cope.
Suppression helps us survive what once felt unspeakable.
But over time, it creates a kind of emotional buildup that silently shapes the nervous system—tightening the body, fogging the mind, and blocking true peace.
Suppression helps us survive what once felt unspeakable.
But over time, it creates a kind of emotional buildup that silently shapes the nervous system—tightening the body, fogging the mind, and blocking true peace.
Your Brain on Suppression
When emotions feel unsafe, your survival brain takes over:
- Brainstem: Triggers fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. Digestion slows, breath shortens, and the body focuses on survival above all else.
- Cerebellum: Coordinates movement, but under stress, everything tightens—thoughts and motions feel jerky or disconnected.
- Occipital Lobe: The brain’s visual center. Trauma here can mean flashbacks, tunnel vision, or hypervigilance.
- Parietal Lobe: Processes sensation. High stress can create numbness or disconnection from your body.
When this “back brain” is in charge, your wise, calm self—the prefrontal cortex—goes offline.
You’re surviving, not thriving.
You’re surviving, not thriving.
The Hidden Cost of Suppression
Suppressing emotion doesn’t make it disappear—it makes your nervous system work overtime to hold it down.
What fires together wires together, and over time, your brain learns that “feeling = danger.”
What fires together wires together, and over time, your brain learns that “feeling = danger.”
This constant internal effort can show up as:
- Fatigue and inflammation
- Muscle tension and pain
- Anxiety, brain fog, or overthinkinghow to change your thoughts
- Digestive issues or autoimmune flare-ups
It’s not weakness.
It’s biology.
Your system is doing everything it can to keep you safe.
It’s biology.
Your system is doing everything it can to keep you safe.
Why Healing Feels Scary—But Isn’t
When you start to process trauma, your brain begins to access memories and emotions it once locked away.
That can feel terrifying—like reopening a wound.
But it’s actually your brain saying:
“You’re finally safe enough to heal.”
That can feel terrifying—like reopening a wound.
But it’s actually your brain saying:
“You’re finally safe enough to heal.”
Healing doesn’t give the perpetrator power.
It gives you the power—to stop reliving their actions in your nervous system.
To stop letting old fear dictate your choices.
To release what was never yours to carry.
It gives you the power—to stop reliving their actions in your nervous system.
To stop letting old fear dictate your choices.
To release what was never yours to carry.
The Internal Family Systems (IFS) View
This isn’t just about your brain—it’s about all the parts of you doing their best to protect you.
- Exiles: The buried emotions—sadness, shame, fear.
- Protectors (Managers): Keep emotions locked down through control, perfectionism, or people-pleasing.
- Firefighters: React fast when emotions surface—numbing, distracting, or exploding.
- The Self: The calm, compassionate core within you—your true healer.
Suppression is the work of Protectors doing their best to help you survive.
But healing happens when the Self leads—gently helping those parts release their burden.
But healing happens when the Self leads—gently helping those parts release their burden.
What Healing Actually Looks Like
It’s not about reliving the trauma.
It’s about creating safety for your body to let go of what it’s been holding.
It’s about creating safety for your body to let go of what it’s been holding.
That might look like:
- Gentle breathwork to move emotion through the body
- Sound healing to regulate the nervous system
- Somatic practices that ground and reconnect
- Compassionate awareness—meeting yourself with curiosity instead of shame
Mini Practice: Reclaiming Safety Within
Try this gentle 5-minute practice to help your body feel safe enough to release:
Anchor: Sit or lie comfortably. Feel the ground beneath you.
Notice: Ask, “Where am I holding tension?”
Breathe: Inhale through your nose for 4 counts, exhale through your mouth for 6.
With each exhale, imagine releasing what’s been held.
With each exhale, imagine releasing what’s been held.
Name It: Silently say, “I notice I’m holding ___.”
Ground: Place a hand on your heart. Take three slow breaths.
Whisper to yourself: “It’s safe to feel. It’s safe to heal.”
Whisper to yourself: “It’s safe to feel. It’s safe to heal.”
Healing Is How You Reclaim Your Power
Processing trauma isn’t giving your past power—it’s how you take your power back.
It’s how you stop being driven by old pain and start living with clarity, calm, and purpose.
It’s how you stop being driven by old pain and start living with clarity, calm, and purpose.
Healing is possible—and you don’t have to do it alone.
If you’re curious about what this process could look like for you, I invite you to book a private Introspective Breathwork® session or join a healing event at www.introspectivewithamy.com.
If you’re curious about what this process could look like for you, I invite you to book a private Introspective Breathwork® session or join a healing event at www.introspectivewithamy.com.
What would reclaiming your power look or feel like for you?
